Archive for December, 2004

 

Year-End Love

Dec 22, 2004 in Bed O Lettuce

It’s almost the end of the year. I was thinking about doing a year end review about everything. But I decided against it, because I’m lazy as fuck. Plus, I got nothing to say. The truth is I can barely remember half of last month, let alone the other half of the year. I mean, I’ve been trying really hard to think about what I was doing back in March or April, and I can’t remember a goddamn thing. But I must have been doing something because I was tired, and bitching all the time about how tired I was. I must have been on some whirlwind bullshit, because I think that’s what the fuck I was moaning about. But I can’t remember. I can’t remember shit. So, that pretty much negates a year end review. You can’t do year end if you can’t remember the first end of the year.

So, what the fuck else do I have to write about before I get the fuck away from this computer for the holidays. Note: I’m not really going anywhere, or visiting anybody special for the holidays. I’ll be stuck here, all by myself. Boo-hooo. No Christmas for me. No Christmas bonus. No ipod from the boss. No cool book from a secret Santa. No new book out to peddle. No new money. No cool fuckin’ Christmas presents. No nothing.

So, STOP FUCKIN’ TELLIN’ ME ABOUT ALL THE COOL SHIT YOU’VE ALREADY GOTTEN FOR CHRISTMAS!!!

Cause I ain’t getting shit. I don’t wanna hear it, or read it, or anything. Everybody all happy and shit. Fuck you happy bastards. I HATE YOU!!! Well, no I don’t, at least not all the way. Just a little bit. I hate you all just a little bit. Beyotches with new books, making money, contemplating their new fuckin’ lives. Yeah. I know I’m supposed to be happy for you all and shit like that. It’s not about the presents, it’s about Jesus. Yeah. Shut the fuck up, beyotch, because it is about the presents. It’s always been about the presents. Those three wise dudes didn’t come empty handed, did they? Nope, you asshole. They came with gifts, crappy gifts, but gifts nonetheless. So, don’t pull that Christ day bullshit on me. If you ain’t getting shit this year, like me, then Christmas ain’t nothing but a beyotch. BEYOTCH, I SAY!

Oh! If I could just piss on you all through these Internets and shit, I would. I’d piss on you, you fuckin’ rich ass Paris Hilton whores. You make me sick. SICK! ARGGH! You’ll rue (I think that’s the right word) the day you flaunted your new big breasted whores in front of me. I’ll make you all pay for my continued misfortunes.

So,

Merry FUCKIN’ Christmas,

Assholes,

I hate you.

Crap Torrent

Dec 20, 2004 in Uncategorized

Several big torrent sites went down last week, or was it this week. Whatever. But you can still hit the SN mirrors, including Bi-torrent. And a cool wrestling torrent, PWtorrents

Top 10 Hip-Hop Albums of 2004: Part 4

Dec 17, 2004 in Uncategorized

Holy hot booty shit. Batman. I’m almost done. Yippeee! Now I can go back to half-assing this shit. You dudes probably won’t see another post from me until the year 3000. Then, BAM! I’m posting all up in yo ass. Anybody catch Smackdown last night. I thought the shit was pretty good, even though from a wrestling perspective, it didn’t make any sense. They not only showed the Cena-Jesus match which was just on Pay-Per-View for free a couple of days later, they also gave away a quality WWE Championship match between Kurt Angle and JBL. That’s PPV worthy shit on free tv. And the Kurt Angle-JBL match was pretty good until the disqualification. I assume the boys up top did it to bring back the public faith in Angle. Many people think because of his neck injury, he just can’t cut it anymore. But last night’s show proved otherwise. It proved that Kurt can still cut a pretty decent promo and put on a top quality match if he wants to. He probably isn’t the most consistent dude in the ring anymore, but he can still put on a good show in spots.

Let’s get off of wrestling and finish this countdown. Where was I? Number 3: Masta Ace’s A Long Hot Summer. It’s funny how the second tier dudes back in the day are doing better than the top names from back then. I mean, Big Daddy Kane, Biz Markie, Kool G. Rap, all got better shine back in the golden age, and Masta Ace was a likable rapper with a nice witty persona who was able to provide a mid-level hit or two back then. Now, the only dude doing better among that group is Ace. He’s dropped several noteworthy albums in recent years, including that Disposable Arts shit from a while back. And people are starting to give him props on that Slaughtahouse shit when he was incorporated. Now, supposedly at retirement, Ace drops another top quality record. I won’t call this shit a classic, but it’s real, like they used to say. Long Hot Summer is one of the most honest releases of the year, and one of the funniest as well, focusing on trying to make it and survive in the rap world. I won’t get into if the story concept that drives this record works like it should. I honestly didn’t pay much attention to the skits. A sidenote: people need to stop making skits, especially the ones with the crappy acting. That I-talian don’t sound all that I-talian to me. Still, as a whole, you won’t get better indie production, done by a slew of players, and better honest rapping by our man Ace than on this record. By the way, Fuck All Y’all.

At number 2 is one of the most hated men in hip-hop, Kanye West, with his debut album, The College Dropout. The main draw of this cd is the production, the same production that kept Jay-Z respectable in the rap game. Kanye’s style is part street, part R&B, driven by soul samples, samba patterns, and hard beats. I hate to say it, but Kanye West helped bring the soul back to hip-hop, which had in recent years been drowned in cold synthesizers, and repetitive, dull boom-bap type bass and drum patterns. On top of this soul driven hip-hop, Kanye went away from the battling and gun talk, which was evident on advanced copies of the album, and focused on real man issues, working at a job you hate but need, wanting and getting things you can’t afford, loving and staying connected to a family with major league issues. He removed the gloss and brought the real gritty world back into hip-hop. Most of the tracks work, even though Kanye West isn’t the tightest emcee, although he’s better than what most call their favorite. And I still find it hard to listen to that workout plan shit. Also, Jay-Z just doesn’t belong on this disc. His attitude just doesn’t fit in with the rest of the album. And isn’t it too bad all this love is going to waste because West seems to have grown too big for his britches. Did I say britches? I meant beyotches. Or did I? Fuck it. Anyway. I won’t let the real Kanye West fuck up the Kanye West portrayed on this album. The College Dropout West has created an identity real hip-hop fans can identify with, and I applaud him for the accomplishment.

At number 1 is the album that most people agree is one of the greatest hip-hop albums of the year. I might actually call this one a classic. I believe people will look at this release ten years from now like they look at that Tribe and Gangstarr shit from the past. I hate when people call bullshit classic, but I just find this shit one of kind. It probably will never be duplicated. And you might find people trying to copy this shit in the near future. The album I’m talking about is Madvillainy by Madlib and MF DOOM, who go by the name Madvillain. This is clean, quick, wham-bam-thank-you-mam hip hop. No hooks, mostly sample-based, with very little singing involved. Most, if not all the songs never go over the three minute mark, one of the reasons the Beatles shit is so good. You better have some tight shit if you go over three minutes in a song. And if your album is over 45 minutes, it better be filled with some of the greatest shit ever heard. Like most movies over two hours, a 45 minute or more cd is usually shit. Anyway, DOOM pretty much flows over the beat until the next skit interrupts him, and then the next skit is interrupted by another Madlib beat, which DOOM immediately slaughters. Well, slaughters may be a little too much, because most of this shit is laid back. The beats are laid back. DOOM’s flow is laid back. This is just some laid back shit. Unlike MM Food, the skits work, and they don’t run on too long. All this shit works together like a cut and paste collage, some real artistic type gallery shit. In fact they should put this shit up in some gallery like a piece of art, because that’s just what this shit is. I dare say, this isn’t just the best hip-hop album of the year, but the best album of the year, period.

Quick Link

Dec 17, 2004 in Uncategorized

Give Me Centrism or Give Me Death!

If you are the kind of person who talks about music too much, there are two words that undoubtedly play an integral role in your workaday lexicon: overrated and underrated. This is because those two sentiments pop up in 90 percent of all musical discussions.What’s interesting about this phenomenon is that no one uses the same criteria when applying either of those terms. For example, bands can be overrated because certain rock critics like them too much (Sonic Youth, Wilco, Yo La Tengo), or underrated if they sell a lot of records but aren’t widely regarded as brilliant (Thin Lizzy, Duran Duran), or underrated because barely anyone seems to know who they are (Tortoise, Sloan, Lifter Puller). Bands can be overrated because they’re good-looking (the Lemonheads in 1992), or they can be underrated because they’re good-looking (the Lemonheads in 1994). Some groups can be overrated and underrated at the same time (Radiohead). Some groups seem overrated on purpose (Oasis). Some groups seem eternally underrated because no matter how hard they try they’re just not as interesting as groups who are overrated on purpose (Blur). It is very easy to be underrated, because all you need to do is nothing. Everyone wants to be underrated. It’s harder to become overrated, because that means people had to think you were awesome before they thought you sucked. Nobody wants to be overrated, except for people who like to live in big houses.

However, I am not interested in overrated and underrated bands.

It’s too easy, and all it means is that somebody else was wrong. I’m obsessed with bands that are rated as accurately as possible in other words, nobody thinks they’re better than they are, and nobody thinks they’re worse. They have the acceptable level of popularity, they have attained the critical acclaim their artistry merits, and no one is confused about their cultural significance. They are, in fact…

Operation Eff Kanye West in the Azz (No Homo?)

Dec 16, 2004 in Uncategorized

Group Petitions The Recording Academy to Revoke Rapper Kanye West’s 10 Grammy Nominations

Members of a group calling itself The Mindset Army have drafted a petition to The Recording Academy seeking to have the popular rapper/producer’s name removed from consideration in the 10 categories in which he was nominated for Grammy Awards.

Sign The Petition

Even More Food

Dec 16, 2004 in Uncategorized

Leftovers
Mm More Food

Top 10 Hip-Hop Albums of 2004: Part 3

Dec 16, 2004 in Uncategorized

Day Three, or day three and three-quarters, however you wanna see it. We’re halfway there to number one. And I’m glad because I can’t keep this posting everyday shit up. It ain’t my style. I like to sneak shit up here when nobody’s looking. They say you should post everyday to keep an ever growing audience, but most people can’t do that shit. That’s why they quit. But if you half-ass it like me, you can go on blogging forever and ever. Post today, wait a week, post twice then, and don’t post for an entire month, then spring shit on beyotches. Ha-Ha! You thought I was GONE! Wrong beyotches. I’m back! That’s the real way to do this shit.

On to number 6. There are underachievers, and there are those you don’t expect shit from. And Masta Killa was the Wu-member nobody expected shit from, but No Said Date defies expectations. Maybe it’s because of that that this album ranks so high. Masta Killa pulls off a fast one and delivers a Wu-album that actually sounds like a classic Wu-album. He does something neither Method or GZA have been able to do, put out a decent album in the new millennium. Makes you wonder if Masta Killa was always so talented and was just being held down by the record companies and the other Wu-members? Or maybe it was just a fluke? I’m going with the latter. That doesn’t take anything away from what the other Killa did this year. He brings all the elements of a Wu-album: the Rza production, the soul samples, and the many Wu-guest appearances. Raekwon and Ghostface kill it on D.T.D, and Ol’ Dirty does his final drunken chorus over some Sandford & Son shit. If you gotta pick up a Wu-album, make sure you check this shit out. It’s Killa. See what I did there. Fuck it.

Let’s go on to Ghostface, who seems to have dropped the Killah for better marketability. It didn’t really help much, because I don’t think The Pretty Tony Album sold that well. Too bad, because it was pretty good, although I will say this shit underachieves. Which is why Ghostface turned around a month or two later after this shit dropped and put out the Theodore Unit album, which featured most of the shit that didn’t make it on Pretty Tony. Makes you wonder if shit like Guerilla Hood and the Drummer had made the album, how better would Pretty Tony have fared? How much more love would this album have gotten? So, how do the two compare to one another. The two releases are two halves of one whole. But Pretty Tony is the better half. Theodore Unit is unfortunately a crew album, featuring way too many lesser rappers. It may have rawer production, but it also suffers from worser rap skills. The only downside with Pretty Tony is that it doesn’t include some of the Ghostface tracks that appear on Pretty Tony, and it suffers from weird sellout shit like Ghostface which is a blatant attempt to get radio play. But shit like Metal Lungies and the classic Holla make up for these missteps. The rest of the album features standard Ghostface shit, soul music over hard beats, with Ghostface flowing nonsensical over that shit in that crazy ol’ man style of his. The worse thing that most people can say about the release is that it just isn’t enough. They wish there were more. And if that’s the worst you can say about this shit, that you wish there were more, it means this shit didn’t do all that bad.

At number 4 is MF DOOM’s MM Food. Most of the album features sample-based hip-hop over ol’ school drumming and beatboxing. Of course there are a boatload of skits, one too many in the middle of the album. DOOM bases each song around a name of food, although I have no idea how they relate to the song content. And this shit suffers much like the King Geedorah release from a year ago, many of the instrumentals have been heard before if you’ve ever picked up his Spices and Herbs shit. Kon Karne still feels like that Grimm track from awhile back. But like Geedorah, Food tends to overcome these deficiencies by the sheer will of DOOM. This shit isn’t heavy and it isn’t light. DOOM freestyles over this shit effortlessly. Many of the songs work better the more you hear them, this in relations from being blown back by a song at first, and later tiring of it. Also, like most good albums, there’s very little filler, outside of the skits in the middle. Each track seems to belong with the rest. I’d personally take a good ten to twelve track release over some bloated 18 to 24 track piece of crap. And what does DOOM deliver, an album that looks and sounds like an album, like all the pieces belong and work together, where there isn’t a track that doesn’t belong. And in the end, isn’t that real album making?

Tomorrow:

3. Masta Ace – The Long Hot Summer
2. Kanye West – College Dropout

Top 10 Hip-Hop Albums of 2004: Part 2

Dec 15, 2004 in Uncategorized

Day Two. Let’s continue on our journey to what I believe were the tightest hip-hop cds of 2004.

At number 9 is My Own Worst Enemy by Edo G featuring Pete Rock. You know Edo G, that Father to your sperm, dude. I honestly don’t remember anything else relevant this dude has done. But Pete Rock, well, we know, Pete Rock is the draw, why most people would buy this cd. Pete Rock does most of the production on the 10 track album, while Edo plays the C.L. role and just raps (Just do my beats, beyotch and let me do my job, hoe. That’s all you gotta do is my fuckin’ beats). These aren’t Pete Rock’s best beats, and Edo G isn’t one of my favorite rappers. But Edo updates his flow and delivery, and Pete Rock’s average shit is better than most producers’ greatest tracks, which results in creating one of the most impressive releases of the year. Pete Rock should’ve produced the entire album though. All he had to do is produce 10 tracks, instead of 7 he provides (lazy bastard). But the other producers come through, especially on Wishing, where Masta Ace continues to impress this year as elder rap statesman.

At number 8 is the weeded out Leak Brothers with their self-titled debut. The Leak Brothers consist of Cage and Tame One. This cd continues where shit like Nighthawks left off, where Cage joins with another Weatherman Crew member to produce somewhat of a concept album, this time all about extra strength weed. I wondered if the theme would hold up through an entire album, and the truth is, it really doesn’t matter. Because this shit is all about mood and attitude. The first half of the cd is standard rap shit, J-Zone, weed talk, Camu, more weed talk, RJD2, and even more weed talk. But by the second half, this shit goes into full Cage territory, you know, that weird, death, druggie, crazed out type shit, especially on the tight Delerium, and the eerie Dead. Hell, even Tame One channeling Slick Rick on Druggie Fresh comes off far more moody and horrific than the Doug E. Fresh party shit it was based on. And that’s good. If you dig that Necro/Cage white boy horror shit, you’ll definitely’ll be able to get into this.

Now we reach number 7 with Handsome Boy Modeling School and White People. Handsome Boy is Prince Paul, former De La Soul and GraveDiggaz producer, and Automator, producer on Dr. Octagon and Gorillaz. There second album goes more into the rock territory. The singing tracks work better than the rapping tracks. I was suprised that I’d enjoy Jack Johnson and John Oates more than I would Casual and Rza, especially since Jack Johnson sucks almost as much as John Mayer. But suprisingly I dug the white boy shit more than the hood shit. This cd is at its best when it’s in mellow mode, which is most of the time. The only real misstep I noticed was with the Chino Moreno, El-P & Cage collaboration The Hours. Chino’s awful singing ruins an otherwise dope track. The song doesn’t kick into high gear until Cage and El-P break on the scene. Also, the skits aren’t quite as funny as they were on on How’s Your Girl. That Chris Elliot sample is killer. But overall, this shit works. So, go get it.

Tomorrow:

6. Masta Killa – No Said Date
5. Ghostface – The Pretty Tony Album
4. MF Doom – MM Food

Quickie

Dec 14, 2004 in Uncategorized

Rare Beatles Christmas Recordings
DC Countdown

Sources tell CBR News that numerous titles already in publication play in to the events of DC Countdown. “Adam Strange,” “Teen Titans,” “JSA” were three of the books mentioned where current and future storylines lead in to “DC Countdown.” And according to our own Rich Johnston, his sources indicate this story leads into a “Crisis 2″ series of some sort.In the solicitation text for “DC Countdown” released today, the only clues given were that each story in the book “follows a member of the JLA through a mystery that touches on nearly every character in the DCU” and that it “is an essential project that features nearly every major character operating in the DC Universe. It’s a project that will resonate for months to come and is a perfect jumping-on point for readers who’ve been wondering where the people who helped deliver ‘Identity Crisis’ could possibly be going next.”

Turning a Crisis Into A Drama

The Crisis 2 saga continues. Written by Geoff Johns, drawn by Phil Jiminez, it appears that “Identity Crisis” and other events across the DC Universe will provide plot points that will all tie into next summer’s extravaganza at DC. Look for a number of books to start kicking things off.An early indicator will be in the “Adam Strange” series. Keep your eyes open over there for something that will kick off Crisis 2… whether in the book, or on a spinoff series entitled “The Rann/Thangar War.”

I’m told other events contributing to the overall revamping and adrenaline injection of the DC Universe include “Day of Vengance,” “Villains United” and “Amazons Attack.”

And recently in an issue of “Teen Titans” written by Geoff Johns, Batman (The Adult Tim Drake) mentions a crisis that happened not long after the Titans got sucked into the future.

Top 10 Hip-Hop Albums of 2004: Part 1

Dec 14, 2004 in Uncategorized

It’s that time of the year again. I did it last year, and here I am doing it again. I’ve seen a couple of the lists already. Some are completely absurb. Somebody had Snoop Dogg and Cam’ron up in there. The man getting most of the spotlight this year is Kanye West. Several magazines have his album at the top. His album is pretty far up there with me also, even though he is an asshole. Seems like there have been a lot of assholes this year. Who knows. I might follow this list up with the top assholes of 2004. I wonder what would be at the top, Beyonce’s asshole or Britney’s asshole. You see what I did there. See it. Amazing. And disgusting.

Anyway. I had a hard time deciding number 10. Usually people put really personal crappy favorites at 10, and I’m no exception. At first, I thought about RJD2’s Since We Last Spoke. The album was uneven, but there were some tracks on there that I really enjoyed. This album wasn’t as decent as DeadRinger, but it was a respectable follow up in the sophomore album vein. I don’t know if I enjoyed his switch from soul to rock, seeing that many of the best tracks on Since We Last Spoke still have a soulful bent to them, but I still respected that he was brave enough to branch out into rock, even if it was corny 80s rock.

Since I wasn’t completely impressed with Since We Last Spoke, I decided to focus on the album I’ve studied the most this year, Foreign Exchange’s Connected. This album was put together over the Internet, or AIM, between Little Brother’s Phonte and some dude named Nickolay (I hope I got that right). I enjoyed this cd because it felt like an album, like all the tracks were meant to be grouped together. The only problem I had with the album was it’s rhythm and blues, neo-soul sound. I’m sorry, but that Roots sound just doesn’t work for me completely when it comes to hip-hop. I like a grittier, more sample based approach, or at least one without so much singing included. 9th Wonder seems to understand the balance. Nickolay doesn’t. Still, I was impressed with this new dude’s production. I think he’ll make a great R&B producer in the future.

So, now I introduce the album I picked for 10. This album came out of nowhere. I kept passing it up. I honestly didn’t think that it would be that great. The cd I’m talking about is Blueprint’s Chamber Music, the best instrumental hip-hop album of 2004. I normally don’t find Blueprint’s production all that compelling. It’s mostly dulling and depressive. But that style works here. Most people won’t be able to get into this brooding symphonic work of art, and at times it approaches elevator music, but after a couple of complete listens, the sound and constuction of the album works for me. And Blueprint seems to be one of the few people around that can make Puff Daddy, or P. Diddy sound deep.

Tomorrow:

9. Edo G Featuring Pete Rock – My Own Worst Enemy
8. Leak Brothers – Leak Brothers