Super-Villain Style

I guess it’s official. Tiffany Fallon is the new Playmate of the Year. That makes three brunettes in a row. The same can be said for the Cyber Girl of the Year, which is voted on by the Cyber Club public. I don’t know if it means anything. I doubt it by the selection of this present year’s Playmates. In fact, I think this year will eventually have more fake hootered blondes than ever before. Maybe it’s Hef’s way of rebelling. He’s gonna make us love them bleach blonde mamas he keeps around him so much, shove them down our throats. Although, I wouldn’t really consider that a completely bad thing. Biscuits, gravy, jelly and a fat booty is all a brother need to get his freak on. I’d slurp it all up in the booty crack. That’s how I do this.

Anyway, getting back to where I was before, I think blondes are sorta played out, especially in Playboy. I’ve seen too many naked blondes. I’ve said it before, but I wouldn’t mind seeing more blacks, latinas, or asians naked in the pages of Playboy. And seeing how the public went Hiromi crazy for Playmate of the Year, I think the rest of the Playboy audience wants more diversity, too.

I wasn’t a real big Hiromi fan. And I suspect that that asian girl fetish shit played into the popularity of Hiromi. White boys can’t resist naked asian chicks. I think it might be the same for all American born dudes of all races, but it’s really bad with the white boy crowd. Put a naked asian chick in front of a white boy, and he’ll have his dick out trying to start a circle jerk in 60 seconds. And the fact that Hiromi has them big fake breasts only makes her even more appealing. But to each his own.

I would have preferred Pilar Lastra, or even Nicole Whitehead, to contradict myself. But I can live with Ms. Fallon, although she really didn’t register on my radar. But in the end, naked is naked, and naked is good. Plus, Tiffany isn’t all bad. She’s kind of hot. You can check her out below.

Tiffany1
Tiffany2

Amy Sue Cooper

With new hooters and some newfound fatback, my first choice for Cyber Girl of the Year 2005 has won. I would have put up a pic or two but I’m too lazy to go through my cd-rs. So, you gets nothing. NOTHING! Except the satisfaction that soon all young girls will learn to truly be accepted in our society, they need really big knockers. And personally, I think that’s a good thing. I shouldn’t be the only person fucked up in the head around here. Plus, the more good looking chicks think they’re fucked up, the more likely I’ll be able to get more ass. So, continue with the poor self-esteem. Not to say any of this is Amy Sue’s fault. She didn’t create the epidemic. She’s only a symptom. But I probably shouldn’t put this shit here. I mean, I am celebrating her accomplishment. And I did enjoy her work immensely. So, YIIIPPPEEE! Congratulations! Weee! Fuck it. There go mo’ money.

Birthdate: April 13, 1955
Birthplace: Santa Monica, California USA

Bust: 36

Waist: 24

Hips: 34

Height: 5′ 6

Weight:118 lbs

Ambitions
To train jumpers (horses).

Turn-Ons
Traveling, keeping on the go.

Turnoffs
When I always get my own way.

My Playmate Fee
Will help me start a business.

Great Performers
James Caan, Steve McQueen, James Taylor, Lauren Hutton

Favorite Author
Hermann Hesse

In My Spare Time
I love to ski, fly, horseback ride, swim or practice ballet.

My Weak Spot
I’m too shy. It keeps people from getting to know me.

The Perfect Meal
Prime rib and champagne.

Interview
Sarah Jayne Moore

Features
“The Great Whale Battle” by Jack Richardson
“America at Speed 55 Be Damned!” by Brock Yates
“World’s Fastest Carnival Ride” by Dan Gerber
“Sex for Your Health” by Edward M. & Jeremy Brecher
“Playboy’s History of Assassination, Part VI — Death Crosses the Color Line” by James McKinley
“And A Picture Tube Shall Lead Them” by John Leonard
“Is There Life After High School?” by Ralph Keyes.

Pictorials
Caution: Women at Work! Models photographed by Richard Fegley.
Debra Peterson (PMOM) photographed by Ken Marcus.
Lillian Muller (PMOY) photographed by Richard Fegley.

Some people like onions. Others don’t. I prefer steak. I hear there’s such a thing as a vegetarian. Weird. I hope I never meet one of them. People love discussing who’s the best, who’s the brightest, who’s the prettiest. And we stick by our choices pretty strongly. Or we’re supposed to stick by our choices in that manner. A man that changes his opinions, however infrequently, is considered whishy-washy, weak, made to react to whimsy. So, we make our choices early on, and we fight hard to stick by them.

Whenever I tell other men that Debra Petersen would probably make my top 10, I am almost always confronted with opposition. Some think that she looks too old. Many hate the enormous amount of, how do you say, foliage about the ether region. Many hate that so many of her pictures display the eagle spread quite religiously. I tend to love all of these faults. It’s one of the reasons why I always glance at the Debra Petersen pictures on a regular basis. I’m addicted to her nature. Or the nature of her pictures.

There are always several women, several Playmates, that define a decade. The way they look, the background setting, the hue, the gloss, the manner, that when you look at that one woman, you’re looking at an entire era. Debra Petersen represents one of those women. The Playmate of the Year, Lillian Muller, who she is coupled with in this issue, is another, which makes the June 1976 issue one of the must-haves for any Playboy historian.

Now rather all of that is true or not is anyone’s guess. But that’s usually how my argument goes. I believe that almost anyone can make the same argument. Someone told me that 1976 was the best year Playboy ever had concerning Playmates. I couldn’t disagree with him. But I couldn’t necessarily agree with him either. How do you make that assessment on some scientific level, where the outcome is always the same, no matter the tools being used to judge, or the perspective. Unfortunately, I don’t think you can.

Instead, all we can ever do is wing it. I wing it all the time. There are some things that I say one day, that I believe and stand by, and hold true to for that 24 hour period, that wouldn’t hold up in the long run, the span of my entire life and judgments. For whatever circumstance, something was important enough, or unimportant enough, that I fought holy for an instance for the acceptance of some idea or belief within the greater group, possibly for sport, or in response to some warped form of personal nature. Who knows.

But I’m sticking by Debra Petersen. She’s one fine Playmate. I couldn’t possibly tell you why she’s one of the greatest. It isn’t that the belief that she’s one of the greatest has dissipated. It’s just that time has passed and the feelings I once exhibited don’t quite exist on the same level as they once did.

Well, on second thought, maybe they have. I can see why I used to get really excited by Debra Petersen. And some of those same feelings still exist. But many exist out of principle alone. And now it has left me. Now I know the thrill is gone.

You know I’m free, free now baby
I’m free from your spell
Oh I’m free, free, free now
I’m free from your spell
And now that it’s all over
All I can do is wish you well

Pompeo Posar Remembered

…he quickly emerged as Playboy’s number one photographer of women, a position he retained and enjoyed for more than 30 years. In Playboy’s early days, often the most difficult thing for a photographer was finding a model and convincing her to take her clothes off. No one did that better than Pompeo. A standing Playboy office joke was Pompeo’s ability to quickly convince women that they were beautiful and that they should be photographed sans clothing. He found prospective Playmates on beaches, in nightclubs, walking down the street, in the elevator, at parties, at Playboy Clubs. His approach was always suave, if not subtle. His good looks, thick Italian accent and engaging smile were weapons that very few women were able to resist.

I’m tired as hell. And it’s Monday morning. I did not watch the Grammy’s so I do not know who won. Cordelia is dead and it was a nice touch. A brand new week begins and I wish I had an extra day. Nobody ever gets an extra day. I never had a boss call me up and say, you know, I think you need an extra couple of days off. Take’em. Trust me. Shit like that never happens, except maybe to rich people, who have the ability to say, you know, I’mma take the morning off. I wish I could just call in and do some shit like that. I’d be fired right on the fuckin’ spot. But I guess that’s life. So, stop the bitchin’.

But I like bitching. You ain’t livin’ unless you’re bitchin’.

Torrie And Sable in Playboy pics
Have your pop-up blockers on because without it…

Torrie and Sable naked. I’ve seen it all before. But these pictures seem somewhat hotter, possibly due to there being two naked women in the same vicinity. And everyone loves two naked women fondling each other. I think men live for lesbian porn. And the catfight. If women would only play around with each and fight each other in skimpy outfits, we’d have no more war. We’d spend our time watching the catfight, and less time thinking up new ways to wipe each other out. Okay, I’m pushing it, mainly because I don’t believe anything I’ve just written.

I may come off a little queer, but I personally hate lesbian porn. It’s boring. Two chicks poking and licking at each other just doesn’t hit it for me. Unfortunately, a hugh horse penis breaking ground in orifice galore must be present before the heat begins. But then we get porn overkill: too much penis in orifice zoomed in for greater view over and over again. And of course, the explosion on the face, back, or stomach.

Then, I’m sick because it hits me that I can’t stand the sight of my own penis, let alone some hugh horse stick with way more semen coming out of it then is naturally possible. I mean, it’s one of the reasons we have sex in the dark. Nobody wants to see all that. Well, unless they’re watching someone else.

The Pornography Industry vs. Digital Pirates

…the mainstream entertainment industry is much more combative when it comes to consumers partly because the songs and movies are so carefully and expensively made and distributed. Movies in his industry, by contrast, are often made in a few weeks, and on budgets that a major studio may spend on coffee and pastries, so piracy is not taken quite as seriously. “Maybe a classic is one thing,” he said, “but they’re not all classics.”

A few merchants in the industry who have tried the kind of aggressive methods used by mainstream entertainment companies say they have not received much in return for their efforts. One company that tried to track down copyright infringers and demand that Internet service providers shut down their sites used BayTSP, an Internet monitoring service that also serves the music and movie industries. “It was costing us a lot of money and was producing absolutely zero results…”

Playboy’s Net move could boost piracy

I would like to end this entry by stating how much I dislike Chingy. Add that no talent hack, Cassidy, too. Word to Cassidy: You do not have a hit single. You are guesting on your own record. R. Kelly sings all over your shit, and all you get to do is spit some tired ass bars in between his crooning. That single you hear all over the radio is R. Kelly’s hit record. It shouldn’t be Cassidy featuring R. Kelly. It should be R. Kelly featuring some Ruff Ryder unknown rap bastard. I hate to tell you dude, but you got 10, which means 5 more on 15. Better get that next hit record out, son. And make sure you don’t put anybody on that shit that’s 10 times better than your little ass.

Peace Out!

Birthdate: May 25, 1978
Birthplace: Baton Rouge, Louisiana

Bust: 34D
Waist: 24
Hips: 36
Height: 5′ 6
Weight:112 lbs

Ambitions:
To live out all of my dreams and goals to the fullest with plenty of success.

Turn-Ons:
Humor is a must! Sensitivity, understanding, compassion, nice hands, athleticism, good kisser.

Turnoffs:
Insensitivity, insecurity, ego trips, bad jokes, narcissism, little-man syndrome.

My Philosophy:
Be strong. Even if you’re not, pretend. No one will know the difference.

Dream Job:
To run my own wildlife center for orphaned and abused exotic animals.

Differences Between L.A. And LA.:
Lots more concrete, no grass, no cows or chickens, too many cars!

My Support:
My wonderful parents, David & Cindy. And my beautiful guy, Shane. I love ya’ll always!

Photographed by Stephen Wayda

Official Shannon Stewart

Interview:
Trey Parker and Matt Stone (South Park Creators)

20 Questions:
James Coburn

Features:
“The New Superathlete” by Allen Barra.
“Rules for the Perfect Relationship” by Steven Slon.
“How to Survive a Night in Tijuana” by Robert B. DeSalvo.
“Little Annie Fanny” by Ray Lago and Don Wimmer.
“Surfing the Web for Contraband” Mark Ehrman.

Pictorials:
Carre Otis photographed by Antoine Verglas
Shannon Stewart (PMOM)
Jodi Ann Paterson (PMOY) photographed by Arny Freytag

Extra:
“The Bond Files” featuring Famke Janssen, Teri Hatcher, Jane Seymour, Kim Basinger, Maud Adams, Babara Carrera, Daniela Bianchi, Maryam d’Abo and Ursula Andress.

Okay, let’s start this off by saying that everything I’m about to write has nothing to do with Shannon Stewart. That shouldn’t be that big of a surprise though because I very seldom write about what I’m supposed to write about. And like I said, today is no exception.

So, you might be asking why I picked Shannon Stewart when I have no intention of writing about her. Well that’s an easy answer there, bunky: Because she’s so damn hot. I really didn’t leave 2000 looking forward to the Playmates of 2001, but there were a few exceptions. And Shannon Stewart was one of them. In fact, I dare say she was my personal primary reason for keeping hope in the future of the magazine. I was looking forward to her possibly being named Playmate of the Year. But that didn’t happen. And that is where I’m going.

Who did make PMOY? Well, it was none other than the new Baywatch bouncer, Pamela Lee replacement, Brande Roderick. I can definitely say that she was one of the worst picks for PMOY that has ever been named. When it was revealed that she had made the prime cut, I think there were many disappointed readers across the globe. Sure, you’ll find the occasional Joe that loved her, but I think many of the loyalist abhorred her. And it wasn’t her fault. And unfortunately, I’m one of them.

Hate is only in the name. Do not feel ashamed. Well, maybe Hef should. He started out the decade bombarding the Playboy readership with chicks he supposedly had had sex with. This would lead to two of the first Playmates of the Year being Viagra pals of his, Brande Roderick, and Dalene Kurtis. Both were long-legged bleach blonde clone girlfriends of his at the time of their selection. As well, Brande signified the developing celebrity whoring that has become commonplace in the magazine. Sorry, folks, but we already have a FHM, and a Maxim. We don’t need a Playboy replica of the phenomenon.

But you can’t stop the tide. Although, I think they’ve tried. Either Hef isn’t banging as many Playmates as he used to, or the Playboy publicity machine isn’t glorifying Hugh’s whoring as much as it used to, essentially keeping it under wraps. Which is a good thing because it was beginning to make me sick. There’s only so much you can take when hearing about a 80 year old dude banging 20 year old women. And I know Hef might not be 80, but he sure looks it. So, I think it’s in Hef’s best interest to be 80, or better yet shoot for 90, then people can say he looks and fucks better than any 90-year-old dude they know.

But getting back at the subject at hand, which in Octavius terms is no subject at hand. And as you can tell how that sentence ended, I don’t know where I’m going with this here. Or do I? Shannon’s issue also marked I believe to be the first time when a PMOY didn’t appear on all of her covers. Many people hated when Christina Santiago didn’t even appear on her PMOY issue cover. They instead went with Sarah Kozar, 15-minute famer extraordinare. Playboy went with the quick hit, instead of fortifying tradition. They went with celebrity whoring instead of the tried and true PMOY. I won’t lie. It pissed me off, mostly because Christina was one hot ass natural mamacita. She deserved that cover. And the Playboy loyalist deserved it, too.

And a couple of years earlier, Playboy tested the waters, giving the readers a Carre Otis overlay over the real cover. As if Carre Otis, former crackhead, heroin addict, 31 year old past tense SI supermodel had more love coming to her than Jodi Ann Patterson, another hot ass playmate that never got the respect she deserved. In the short term, it might have led to a spike in readership. In the long term, I have no doubt that it has led to a loss in subscribers, the foundation of any magazine readership. And unfortunately, Playboy as of late, under new leadership, has decided to use the quick hit over the long haul.

Now I’m feeling bad that I didn’t give Shannon Stewart any love in this entry. I think she deserves a word or two on why she will most likely make my top 10 Playmates of the first new millennium decade. Let’s say that I love that whole innocent, sweet down home southern thing Playboy tried to express.

It may be far from who she really is, but we all know image is everything: The ideal Playmate, straight from their mama’s bosom, looking forward to fame in the big city, with hopes of going home to take care the animals of the world. How sweet. I mean Playboy wasn’t really on her mind. She was in the big city modeling. That dream seemed like it was dead. A friend tells her to try Playboy. And the rest is history.

Good job. Good job all around, definitely better than living to be able to pose naked since you were nine, hoping for millions of men to jerk off to your image for all eternity. Definitely better than the creep out moment many present Playmates give off in their interviews. Great job at invoking an image reminiscent of why people started reading Playboy in the first place. If only those new dudes can get back to doing some of the old things that made Playboy worth reading.

The Facts:

Birthdate: February 17, 1947
Birthplace: Kingman, Arizona USA

Bust: 38″

Waist: 22″

Hips: 36″

Height: 5′ 4

Weight:108 lbs

Ambitions:
I would like to appear in national TV commercials.

Turn-Ons:
Tom Jones

Turnoffs:
Cruelty to animals, my hay fever.

If I Had More Time:
I would establish a non-profit modeling agency for Mexican-American women.

In My Spare Time:
I’m assistant director and emcee of the Miss California Bikini Pageant at the California State Fair.

Growing Up:
I lived all over. My father was in the Air Force. We lived in Arizona, Washington, Germany, Montana, Florida, Japan, Hawaii, Montana (again), Panama, and finally, California. My dad now sells insurance.

Great Reads:
“The Defense Never Rests,” “The Games People Play,” “The Female Eunuch,” “The Peter Principle.”

Favorite Authors:
Truman Capote, Germaine Greer and F. Lee Bailey

Favorite Films:
“Gone With the Wind,” “Wuthering Heights,” and “The Graduate.”

My Ideal Evening:
Watching an old movie starring Ronald Reagan and eating popcorn.

My Friends Know:
That I am paradoxical. I appear outgoing but am very shy and only self-assertive through sheer will power. I assume this has to do with my astrological sign, Aquarius.

My Weak Spot:
Impatience. The best solutions to problems cannot be found hastily.

photographed by Mario Casilli.

Illustrated History Of Pro Wrestling In Northern California
Centerfold Picture
The Man Who Got No Sign
Playboy’s 50 ImageMakers: 35 Pete Turner

Contents:

Interview:
Carroll O’Conner

Features:
“Seduction is a Four-Letter Word” by Germain Greer
“By The Bay” by Herbert Gold
“To China with Nixon” by William F. Buckley, Jr
“And So it Goes” by Tom Fitpatrick
“The Natural” by Laurence Gonzales
“Adventures of a Litigious Law Buff” by Calvin Trillin

Pictorials:
Pete Turner’s Turn-Ons by Pete Turner

Playboy’s Playmate Review
Linda Summers, Vicki Peters, Carol O’Neal, Debbie Davis, Lenna Sjooblom, Mercy Rooney, Sharon Johansen, Ellen Michaels, Susan Miller, Deanna Baker, P.J. Lansing and Marilyn Cole.

Let’s move up a decade. It was the beginning of the 70s. The sexual revolution was in full swing. The first full view of pubic hair would appear in January of 1971 with Liv Lindeland some 10 to 15 years after Playboy began. You can make light of that fact as you see fit. Miki Garcia was the second playmate to pose in full frontal nudity, and might have been the first Latina. The first woman to appear full frontal is Marilyn Cole in January of 1972.

Miki Garcia grew up moving around due to the fact that her father was in the Air Force. Her family settled in Sacramento. She eventually worked bikini contests and became a ring girl known as Miss Wrestling for Big Time Wrestling in California, which featured stars such as Pat Patterson, Rocky Johnson and Peter Malvia. Those familiar with present day wrestling know that Rocky Johnson is the Rock’s father, and Peter Malvia is his grandfather. Miki’s job consisted of holding a sign indicating the upcoming round while wearing a bikini.

Afterwards Miki would pose for Playboy and stay on with the company for over 10 years as an executive and director of Playmate promotions. Her relationship with the company ended in 1985 when she testified against Playboy in hearings for the Meese Commission on Pornography. She accused Playboy and Hefner of creating an atmosphere where rape and drug abuse took place; where many of the women were forced to have breast augmentations and engage in orgies; where venereal diseases and forced abortions were the norm; and where attempts of suicide were part of everyday mansion life. One of the most damaging accusations was of a prostitution circuit ran right from the Playboy mansion where many of the workers were playmates.

Of course, I doubt if any of this can be verified. It’s all rumor and innuendo. But some of the accusations seem as if they could be true, especially the rampant drug use, and the forcing of breast augmentations. But I doubt if anyone could put a bullet to the head of a playmate or a mansion visitor. It was the 70s. What else were you expected to do? You want to get naked and get paid, pop some silicone in those babies. You want to hang in the Grotto, better bring some coke with you. The atmosphere was a symptom of peer pressure, the scene, and the times. I doubt if Playboy or Hefner can be made the primary blame for it.

I won’t go into the downfalls of the sexual revolution, be it to say that with freedom comes a consequence of negative or positive proportion. When people make unrestricted decisions due to being truly free, personal liability is a must. Peer pressure can never be an excuse. People must accept their own fate, embrace their choices, especially when there are undesirable results.

Miki seems to agree. Recent comments suggest that she has come to grips with her Playboy past, calling it a wonderful period in her life. I assume that time heals many wounds, especially when the tiger is put down and revealed to be a little kitten, something present-day Playboy must accept. The mansion is nothing more than a museum, a marketing ground, and Hefner, an old relic very past his prime. Nostalgia always can be romanticized, redefined by the hazy view of time.

The Facts

Birthplace: Los Angeles, California USA
Birthdate: Dec 8, 1945

Bust: 38

Waist: 22

Hips: 37

Height: 5′ 4

Weight:118 lbs

Ambitions:
To act in legitimate theater.

Turn-Ons:
Sports.

Hobbies:
Music, playing concert piano, ballet, modern jazz dance, scuba diving.

Did You Know?
I studied Russian ballet for seven years and have worked as a dancer in the New York City Ballet. I also had some movie parts as a child.

I Keep Busy With:
Swimming, taking care of and riding my horse, and driving my sports car.

What I Like In Men:
Honesty and sincerity.

I Dislike Men Who:
act like they’re God’s gift to women.

PMOM photographed by Pompeo Posar and Edmund Leja.
PMOY photographed by Pompeo Posar.

Was in Beach Blanket Bingo

Playboy’s 50 ImageMakers: 16
46 in Playboy’s 100 Sex Stars of the Century
The first American women in space went there naked

Contents: 1963

Interview:
Albert Schwietzer

Features:
“How to Read a Book Superficially” by Mortimer Adler
“The Morals of Money” by J. Paul Getty
“To Paradise by Ferry” by Arthur Kopit
“Saltpeter and the Wolf” by William Zinsser
“How to Talk Dirty and Influence People: Part Three of an Autobiography” by Lenny Bruce.

Pictorials:
Susan Strasberg photographed by Peter Basch
Kim Novak photographed by Bert Cann

Editors’ Choice: 10 favorites from Playboy’s first 10 years
Janet Pilgrim
Lisa Winters
Joyce Nizzari
Ellen Stratton
Heidi Becker
Christa Speck
Avis Kimble
Connie Mason
Christine Williams
Donna Michelle

Contents: 1964

Interview:
Jack Lemmon

Features
“Papa and the Playwright” by Kenneth Tynan
“Big-League Bridge” by Alfred Sheinwold

Pictorials:
Donna Michelle photographed by Pompeo Posar
Terri Kimball photographed by Pompeo Posar

Playmates Revisited — 1957
Sandra Edward
Colleen Farrington
June Blair
Sally Todd
Carrie Radison
Marlene Callahan
Dawn Richard
Dolores Donlon
Gloria Windsor
Linda Vargas
Jean Jani
Jacquelyn Prescott

The 50th anniversary of Playboy has just past. Everybody knows the first playmate was Marilyn Monroe. Donna Michelle was the 10th Anniversary playmate, and a pretty great playmate to boot. She would be named Playmate of the Year in 1964, one of the youngest named, clocking in at 18. Which means she was 17 when her original playmate shoot was first published. I’ll go a little more into this later.

Here are all the anniversary playmates: 5th year (1958), Joyce Nizzari; 10th year (1963), Donna Michelle; 15th year (1969), Leslie Bianchini; 20th year (1974), Nancy Cameron; 25th year (1979), Candy Loving; 30th year (1984), Penny Baker; 35th year (1989), Fawna MacLaren; 40th year (1994), Anna-Marie Goddard; 45th year (1999), Jaime Bergman; 50th year (2004), Colleen Shannon. I see a couple of playmates who will probably make my list.

Now let’s get back to the subject at hand: Age. Donna Michelle isn’t the only playmate to appear nude in the magazine before her 18th birthday. The first was Elizabeth Roberts. The story goes that Roberts, who was featured in the January 1958 issue, was 16 when her nudes were taken. Her mother actually went with her when the photo shoot took place. Hefner and Roberts’s mother were charged with contributing to the delinquency of a minor. These charges were later dropped due to lack of evidence.

But this didn’t stop Playboy from featuring more underaged girls. At least 3 more women, excluding Michelle, would be featured in the magazine before turning 18: Teddi Smith, July 1960; Nancy Crawford, April 1959; and Linda Moon, October 1966, who turned 18 during the month her pictorial was published.

The only other major instance of this occurring is in 1977 with Ursula Buchfellner. She was only 16 when her pictures appeared in a German edition of Playboy. Two years later she would become an official playmate, appearing in the October 1979 American edition of Playboy.

It is believed that many of the playmates had their photo shoots taken before their 18th birthday, seeing that many of the photos were taken months in advance from being published, and still are. And who knows about the many playmates who have lied about their age, presenting false documentation.

Of course this couldn’t occur in present-day Playboy. Child pornography is off-limits and can get you locked up even if you think about it, and for the most part, rightfully so. I have a problem with a man being locked away for just thinking about having sex with little children. How many grown men thought about Britney Spears in a overtly sexual way before her 18th birthday? How many young women present themselves in suggestive ways, and have been thought of in overtly suggestive ways by adult men and women in today’s society. I would assume a lot of upstanding, hardworking citizens may have committed a felony several times over in the current legal and moral climate.

The young, barely legal image permeates throughout modern media and modern society. Something that passed as sexual and taboo in the past, is front and center today. From Britney Spears to Christina Aguilera, sex, and particularly, young woman sexuality, is a major industry marketing tool to sell clothing (Abercrombie & Fitch), music, movies, and television. The super model gets younger and younger every year. And young women dress and act far more provocatively than they did in the past. What was once only thought about in novels (Lolita) and underground art and pornography is now on display as a commonplace commodity and occurrence.

Woo.

Where did all that serious thought come from? It’s time to tack on a happy ending.

Let’s get back to the point of all this: the playmate. I really dig Donna Michelle. There’s nothing special about her original pictorial, although I do love the pictures with her hair wild, big and messed up. It’s classic 60s cheesecake.

Donna is naturally beautiful. She also has a very toned body that isn’t overdone like what might be seen today in the magazine. She’s one of the few playmates that I love seeing complete nudes of, without all the lingerie and backdrops. I personally hate all the extra stuff that’s supposed to create atmosphere and mood in the pictorials. Unfortunately, a lot of playmates need it, including the big hair and overdone make-up. And Playboy has succeeded far more than they’ve failed at creating an playmate image. Fortunately, many of the great ones don’t need it as much. I guess that’s why they’re considered the great ones.

I’m consumed with sleeping, and yet I only get about five hours a night. And it kills me throughout the day.

Rachel Hunter goes topless for Playboy

If you give me 1 mil, I’ll show my titties. Shit. I’ll show you my shit for 5 dollars and a roll of toilet tissue. But be forewarned, they’re hairy man-boobs. But I’ll do pretty much anything for my female fans. Because that’s the kind of man I am.

Now back to Rachel’s nudies. No pubic hair, which means these pictures can be considered tasteful. And I’ve always thought she was older than 34. I could have sworn she was 40 or something. FortySomething. I guess being married to Rod Stewart ages you. The closer you get to Rod, the slower time becomes, similar to the horizon of a black hole. Yeah. Rod Stewart is the black hole to famous super models. Run while you can.

You know who I wouldn’t mind seeing naked in Playboy, a better choice on the level of Cindy Crawford or Stephanie Seymour? Adriana Lima. That’s right, Adriana Lima. Who, you say? Adriana Lima, the Victoria’s Secret model with the pouty lips and the hot ass, the skinny Brazilian chick with the sex-me-daddy looks. You’ve seen the commercials, the ads, the annual model shows. She’s the present day Tyra Banks or Heidi Klum of Victoria’s Secret. Now her posing would be big news. And she’s posed nude before which means there’s a good chance that she would say yes.

Rachel Hunter is yesterday’s news. Like I give a fuck who she’s fucked, whether it be Rod Stewart or Robbie Williams. Sure that Stacy’s mom video was nice, but that’s all she’s good for. She’s already a trivia question. It’s time to fast forward, get present tense. Get the next shit. And Lima’s the next shit. Trust me.

Rachel Hunter is to appear topless in Playboy magazine in a deal reported to be worth £1million.

However, the 34-year-old former wife of rock star Rod Stewart won’t go fully nude according to those close to her.

She was approached by the magazine when she was 17, but turned down their offer because she was too young.

Hunter is said to have completed the shoot this week. The pictures will appear in a music edition, featuring Rachel because of her marriage to Rod and her fling with Robbie Williams.

A source close to her told The Sun: “She will be going topless but refuses to be completely nude. The pictures will be as tasteful as possible. She’s really comfortable showing off her body.”

She’s due in Australia this weekend to work on film comedy You And Your Stupid Mate.

Playboy hits AOL with internet suit

The case is related to the use of the words “playboy” and “playmate” as signposts in the Netscape online search engine.

The words were included in a list of about 400 such as “sex” or certain body parts that would identify users interested in buying adult-themed merchandise. People typing those words into the search engine would automatically be sent banner advertising for various adult-themed sites that were not associated with Playboy Enterprises.

Playboy argued in its suit that the links tarnished and diluted its brand name by associating its trademark with inferior products. Barry Felder, a lawyer for Playboy, said the firm was seeking damages “well into seven figures.”

You know what I’m thinking. I say let’s come up with unique terms and associate that shit with our sites. I’m not talking about lame ass shit like fair and balanced. I’m talking about shit like Doctar Ronny Octavius.

Let’s say you type that shit exactly like that into Google and Google comes up with some links and place some of their shitty ass text ads on top and to the side. And that shit doesn’t link to Super-Villain Style, but to some other bullshit. I think I should be able to sue, too. Or have Google pay a fee to me to use Doctar Ronny Octavius to use for link advertisements.

Sure, it may only work with legally filed copyrighted and trademarked material. Of course, this would mean that Google and Yahoo drop my links from its search engine. And then nobody would visit this piece of shit. But hey, I say a man’s gotta gamble. Right?

FCC chairman seeks obscenity crackdown

Powell said he would ask Congress to increase the fines, which haven’t been raised in decades, at least tenfold. They are now capped at $27,500 for a single violation and $270,000 for a series of breaches.

The Facts

Birthdate: December 13, 1942
Birthplace: Hollywood, California USA

Bust: 35

Waist: 22

Hips: 35

Height: 5′ 3

Weight:110 lbs

Ambitions:
Acting. I’ve studied musical theater, but I prefer drama.

Turn-Ons:
My husband.

Turnoffs:
Being inactive, getting up too early.

Job History:
Acting, dancing, singing, ballet instructor.

Hobbies:
Guitar, painting, writing and folk music.

I Stay Busy With:
Swimming, badminton and hiking.

What I Like In Men:
Sincerity in their friendships.

What I Dislike In Men:
Boorishness.

photographed by Mario Casilli

Contents

Interview:
Richard Burton

Features:
“Love, Death and the Hubby Image” by William Iversen
“Playboy’s Pigskin Preview” by Anson Mount
“The Businessman at Bay” by J. Paul Getty.

Fiction:
“The Life Work of Juan Diaz” by Ray Bradbury

Pictorial:
“Europe’s New Sex Sirens”
Shirley Anne Field, Elki Sommer, Sylva Koscina, Danny Saval, Stefania Sandrelli, Daniella Rocca, Sahar Miles, Catherine Deneuve, Alexandra Stewart, Scilla Gabel, Claudia Cardinale, Dahlia Lavi, June Ritchie and Romy Schneider.

Well. Well. Well. I decided to go back in time for my first 2004 pick for Playmate of the Week. And it was a little hard because the playmates of the 60s are one big lumped group to me. I would be lying if I chose Stella Stevens because I’ve only seen two pictures from her Playboy pictorials. And only one of these pictures were found on Playboy’s own website.

Unfortunately, I didn’t start reading Playboy until the late 80s. And my collection only goes back to the late 70s. So, any real or long held beliefs on playmates start sometime after then. And I must disclose that many of my personal favorites live somewhere between the mid-80s and the late 90s. But I decided to stretch myself in developing this list.

I know 60s Playboy only from what I’ve read or seen in books, magazines and the Internet. And suprise, there isn’t much written about the 60s playmates on the Internet. Or even on Playboy’s own website. Hopefully over time, Playboy will realize there’s a treasure trove of material that many people out here would love to get their hands on.

And not just a book release every couple of years. But a true 50s and 60s web archive that can be accessed through the Cyber Club or another web entity. I always hear about these great stories and the one of a kind pictorials that appeared then. I definitely wouldn’t mind seeing this stuff.

Now onto my pick, Victoria Valentino. The best description is natural. Now I’m not talking about body image or anything. I mean in terms of being made up. Everything seems understated in her appearance. It seems the photographer was going for an old-style classical look. Something from out of one of those old paintings with the wide-bottomed model laying on a couch or bed. And it works.

Victoria isn’t knock-out gorgeous. But her look is overwhelming. Her face is a simple beauty. A natural beauty. Great big eyes. Hair, parted and flat. Her body is straight hourglass. Again, I hate to be repetitive. But she’s something special that you’ll never see again in the pages of Playboy. Outside of the fact that it appears that she was clean-shaven down under. Unfortunately, Playboy didn’t show pubic hair back then. So, I doubt if it can be verified.

From what I’ve heard, she hasn’t hidden from her playmate past. She’s very active on the centerfold circuit and has kept herself connected with many of the past and present playmates. One of the things I think a lot of readers hate are playmates that try to distance themselves from Playboy. Some end up coming back. Jaime Pressly, never a playmate, once said that she would never pose nude for Playboy again, hopefully looking to focus on an acting career. Now here she is posing nude to promote that same damn acting career. Could we see Jenny McCarthy back? Never say never. Especially when it comes to money and fame.